No one can accuse Robert Pattinson of being a shrinking violet when it comes to his love life. Since his split with Twilight co-star Kristen Stewart, he’s been linked to a veritable line of beauties. He’s even done the cheating thing with old girlfriends. Who knows? Maybe he really is a one-woman man and he plans on keeping his single status for the rest of his life. Whatever the case may be, one thing is for sure: He’s had enough sex-related drama to last him a lifetime.
His latest scandal centers around his purported hookup with 19th century poet and author Lord Byron. Supposedly, the two spent a night together in 1823. And what happened after that? The Daily Mail claims that Byron wrote a poem inspired by the experience and titled “Darkness.”
Now, whether or not you consider yourself to be someone who enjoys reading poetry, you have to admit that this sounds sort of amazing. I mean, just think about how many great lines you’ll be able to recite from memory. “Darkness,” by Lord Byron. “Naked, except for a leather strip that covered my modesty. / My hair was tied up in a bow, and around my neck was a wreath of ivy and myrtle.” Pretty cool, right?
While we await more details about this story (or at least the tell-all memoirs of either party), let’s take a trip down memory lane to revisit some of the other scandals surrounding this particular Hollywood superstar.
Best Man On The Planet
We’ve all seen enough romantic comedies to know the drill. The handsome lad meets the beautiful girl, they fall in love, but all is not well. Then there’s a lot of drama leading up to the big wedding. Finally, in true romcom fashion, the movie ends with a happy (albeit, slightly contrived) couple.
But what if the couple in question is Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart? What if their problems had nothing to do with romance and everything to do with family? The couple was already living together when Twilight came out in 2008, and after that movie, they became even more attached to one another. Their first child, Cosmo, was born in 2010. Since then, they’ve had two more children together. Apple and Rowan.
In 2013, they got into a heated argument on Twitter about Stewart’s alleged infidelity. It was at that point that rumors about them began to swirl. And just last month, Radar Online ran a story about Stewart allegedly getting pregnant by her Twilight co-star. Again, no confirmation either way, but this one certainly isn’t old news.
In 2016, Robert Pattinson fell in love with his Uber driver. And what is less common is for a celebrity to fall in love with their Uber driver. Usually, these kind of stories end in disaster, with the celebrity getting arrested for something (usually a crime against humanity, like soliciting a prostitute or pimping). But not always.
After their first date, Pattinson invited his new Uber driver, whose name is Timothy, to move in with him. The next thing you know, they’re making out on the floor of Pattinson’s garage. A photo from inside the garage appears to confirm the report, showing the pair completely covered in dirt and grime.
But this wasn’t some shady plot to get a free ride to the airport. According to Timothy, the two are completely in love with one another and plan on securing a lifetime commitment after their romantic date. Although he didn’t specifically say they’re getting married, it certainly sounds like that’s what he meant. If this story is true, it would be one of the more stunning comebacks we’ve ever seen.
Hollywood’s It Boy
It’s been hard to miss all the stories about Robert Pattinson these days. The 27-year-old English actor has practically carved out a niche for himself in Hollywood. Aside from appearing in some of the biggest movies of all time (Twilight, Good Witch, Edward Cullen, and the upcoming Pirates of the Caribbean: Salazar’s Revenge), he’s also shot to fame for being one of the most photographed men in the world. And we mean that literally. According to Forbes, he’s one of the top 50 most followed people on Instagram.
Aside from all his film appearances and the Instagrammable poses, Robert Pattinson is a bit of a wild child. He’s been linked to some of the most beautiful and talented women in the world. He was even previously engaged to marry one of these brilliant ladies, Mia Wasikowska, but called off the wedding just a few months before the big day. They had known each other for years and were completely devoted to one another. Their love story was featured in the 2014 film, The Great Gilly Hopkins, which was directed by Michael Scott and written by the former Office writer, Ben Silverio.
Then there’s the drinking. Apparently, he’s an absolute demon when it comes to booze. Rumors about his drinking have been swirling for years. But it was after his breakup with Kristen Stewart that he really got into his own car and started driving around to find drunk people to pick up and drive home. He later told Rolling Stone about this time in his life: “I was like, ‘I’m not defined by my problems, I’m defined by my solutions.’ And the solution was drinking.”
The King Of The Greenwood
Remember that scene in The Hobbit, when Bilbo Baggins meets the dragon and the two of them engage in this epic battle? After the dragon is killed, Bilbo finds a magical ring that allows him to call upon the king of the Greenwood to help him recover from his wounds. And what is the king of the Greenwood? Why, it’s none other than our very own Robert Pattinson.
Bilbo asks the king to retrieve his precious gold for him. The wizard uses his powerful ring to conjure up the King of the Greenwood, who shows up with an entire army of trees. In return for Bilbo’s gold, the trees help him recover from his injury. And what is the moral of the story? Don’t Mess With Dwarfs. Unless, of course, you’re one of them. Then by all means, go ahead and mess with them. They can’t help you if they’re dead. Just enjoy yourself and have fun.
These are just a few of the stories about Robert Pattinson. It’s pretty obvious that he’s been through a lot in his life. He’s suffered a lot of heartache and has obviously found ways to overcome these obstacles. No one can accuse him of not trying. Despite his many trials and tribulations, he’s managed to maintain his sense of humor. We’ve even heard that he’s quite the prankster. So, as you can see, he’s not exactly lacking in talent or charm. But is he a good actor or just an idiot who got lucky?
There’s no clear answer to that question. We don’t know if he’s a good actor or a bad actor. But what we do know is that he’s a lot of fun to watch. We’re just so used to seeing him in dramas and thrillers that it will be interesting to see what he does next. And who knows? Maybe he’ll even pull off a dramatic role. Stranger things have happened. We just need to wait and see.