I have a confession to make. When I first heard that Robert Pattinson was getting back together with his boyfriend and co-star, Charlie Hunnam, I genuinely cried happy tears. I have loved Robert Pattinson since I first saw him play Edward Cullen in the hit film, Twilight, and have been cheering for his solo endeavours ever since. I have always felt that he and Charlie were meant to be together and have admired them both as genuine, sensitive men who deserve to be happy.
But now that they are back together I wonder, does being with someone you love make you stronger? Can you be happier with your partner then you were single? Can a reconciliation solve all your problems?
Find out what makes Rob happy, satisfied and successful in his personal life and how you can apply his methods to your own relationship in this comprehensive guide.
Prioritise Your Relationship
One of the first things that anyone will tell you to do when trying to get back together with your lover is to put your relationship first, above all else. But, is this necessarily the case?
People in long-term and stable relationships will tell you that valuing your partnership is the best way to ensure that your needs are met. But what if your needs aren’t being met? What if you feel like you’re suffocating because your partner doesn’t seem to value your opinion or feel the same way about your feelings?
For example, let’s say that Rob is the type of person who values his independence and freedom, but you feel that you need to be a part of a team to be happy. You can have a long and rewarding partnership without sacrificing your individuality.
The reverse is also true. You can have an independent, free-spirited personality and be happily partnered with someone who values collaboration and bonding. In both scenarios, you’re able to coexist and have a good partnership. But, which one is more important to you?
Think about the last time that you and your partner disagreed about something. Was it a trivial matter, or was there some deeper meaning behind the conversation? If you’re able to have a genuine, mature conversation about your differences, you’ll discover that you actually have a lot in common, despite your disagreements. This type of open-mindedness can lead you to a more sustainable, long-term relationship and, ultimately, greater happiness.
In today’s world, a lot of emphasis is put on women being confident, sassy and assertive; and, as a result, many women feel empowered by those three qualities. But, what does being confident truly mean?
To begin with, being confident means standing by your convictions and decisions. If you’re not comfortable with yourself, it’s going to be very hard to have confidence in your decisions and actions. You need to like and respect yourself enough to stand by your decisions, even if you’re not necessarily happy with them. But, if you don’t even like yourself, why should you be confident?
For example, let’s say that you’re a lawyer who decides to become an accountant because you feel that it’s a more suitable career path for you. You may not like many of the things that the accountant does, but you must respect his decision to become an accountant. If you show contempt for him, it’s unlikely that you’ll treat him with the respect that he’s due. This, in turn, will cause you to lose respect for yourself.
You may also need to learn to be more assertive. If you’ve been brought up to be shy and avoid confrontation, it may take some time for you to learn to be more confident. Even if you’ve always felt comfortable speaking your mind and expressing your opinions, there may be situations where you feel silenced or intimidated. If this describes you, start small. Say something like, “I think that…” or “I feel that…” Instead of launching into a monologue about why you’re right and he’s wrong, learn to listen and speak only when appropriate. This will help you gain confidence. Once you do, the sky is the limit as to what you can achieve.
Create A Plan
When you’re trying to reconcile with your partner, it’s important to set some guidelines for the immediate future. Make a list of everything that you need, both personally and professionally. Once you have that list, you can begin to think about what you’re going to do to make sure that each of your needs are met. This will naturally lead you to identify the specific problems that you’re facing and develop solutions for them. It may also inspire you to consider new ideas and alternatives to existing problems. This is why creating a plan is so important. It may feel overwhelming and chaotic to jump into a new relationship, especially if you’re doing so with someone whom you’ve been with before. You want to make sure that you have everything written down beforehand so that you can follow a structured approach. This will help you become more confident and organised. It may also prevent you from doing or saying the wrong thing by accident. There’s no need to explain that making a plan, writing things down, and being organised will help you get the best possible results from your partnership. You’re already halfway there!
Writing things down will also improve your memory. If you write things down and keep a few things in mind at all times, it’s less likely that you’ll forget something or make a mistake. This is why I always recommend writing things down, even if you feel like you have perfect memories. Being an excellent, naturally gifted musician undoubtedly helped Rob’s memory. It probably also helped that he was a very organised and prepared person. He would always make sure to write down exactly what he needed to do for any given day. He may have been an incredible musician, but he certainly wasn’t perfect. He would forget things and make mistakes, especially when under lot of stress or pressure. But, all of this was more than made up for by his incredible talent and his sheer determination to succeed.
Learn From The Experts
It’s important to do your research and learn as much as you can about the nature of your problem. It may be difficult to accept, but a lot can go wrong in a relationship, even if you intend it to be healthy and long-lasting. This is why it’s so important to learn from the experts and read about the subject in-depth. This way, you’ll know exactly what you’re getting into and be able to find the root of the issues that you might be facing. In other words, you’ll know what expectations are genuine and what ones are manufactured by you or your partner. For example, let’s say that your girlfriend has a temper and gets easily irritated. You may not want to marry her because she gets jealous easily and has a bad temper. However, you may find that she has an incredible sense of humour and enjoys being around people that she finds amusing. In this case, you may want to consider whether or not the temper is a deal-breaker for you. You may think that it is, but it might not be. You’ll never know until you try.
When you do find out, you’ll feel relieved and more empowered, as opposed to overwhelmed and deflated. Learning to be happy is not as difficult as you’d think. It takes some time and a little bit of self-discipline, but it’s definitely achievable. You may not be able to give the perfect speech or solve all your partner’s problems, but you will be able to support them and be there for them when they need you. This is the type of relationship that makes you both stronger, and, as a result, happier individuals. You’re both mature, responsible adults who are willing to work hard and be there for each other. And isn’t that what’s important?